


falsify me

by falling_winter_rose



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Angst, Angst Poetry, Angst and Feels, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Angst and Tragedy, F/M, Heavy Angst, Poetry, Prose Poem, Romance, Slow Romance, Teen Romance, Tragic Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-04
Updated: 2018-10-04
Packaged: 2019-07-25 03:28:23
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 529
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16189121
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/falling_winter_rose/pseuds/falling_winter_rose
Summary: anchor me down to the ground, then disappear into the darkness below, forever out of reach / sirius black and marlene mckinnon, the spirits forever separated by the barrier of those who come through the veil





	falsify me

you anchor me down to the ground

pulling me down

from the falsified joy i felt before

/

you hold me in your arms

i try not to breathe in

try to let the moment last

/

you were just the

‘flavor of the week’

at first

the girl of the day

the wooing of the week

not real

none of it was real

/

everyone wanted you

you wanted no one

but i saw you for who you truly were

/

at first you hated me

but then i managed to make you see

who i truly was

[cause, you see,

_ you _ were more than just

the flavor of the week]

/

i didn’t trust this at first

wondering why you would ever

take an interest in me

silly marlene mckinnon

so ugly her parents left

they didn’t want her

little ugly blood traitor bitch

/

it seems i’ve finally fallen from my heaven

where i could have anyone i wanted

anyone but the girl on the ground

_ you _

i’ve fallen down down down

through the miles and miles of clouds

but down here i’ve got you

and that’s enough

//

you weren’t the boy i knew

not anymore

you weren’t loyal sirius black

handsome sirius black

loving sirius black

you are

death eater sirius black

killed his best friend, sirius black

_ ihateyouihateyouihateyou. _

sirius black.

/

there is one happy memory that

the dementors can never take

and that is your face

[you are keeping me alive

in the midst of a living hell.]

/

how am i still in love with you?

i miss your face

your loving smile

your chaste, soft kisses

_ ihateyou. _

but i don’t.

/

i am hoping that you will not hate me

that perhaps one day the truth will be known

and you will be there

and perhaps we will still have a chance

/

the last thing i say is

_ sirius black. _

i feel as if your hands are still there

anchoring me to the earth

begging me to stay

but i can’t

not anymore.

//

i am out.

i am  _ alive _

and

you are gone.

that is the first thing i can hear.

the only thing i can hear.

/

…

/

_ this has to be a dream, _

i tell myself

another falsified memory

another nightmarish dream

brought on by the horrors of azkaban

maybe i’m still inside these prison walls

maybe i never managed to escape.

/

…

/

but i can see your grave.

i can see the urn where your ashes are,

burned from the body with eyes still open

unseeing

unblinking

unalive.

falsified life.

/

…

/

it is everything i can do not to do it

a simple spell

a wand pointed at my own heart

and it will be over

and you will be there

with me

in the dark

together.

/

…

/

i feel the cold wind as i pass through the veil

and i can see your face

the memories coming back

taunting me

because i cannot touch you

the veil has sent me into a wall

where i will forever look upon the ghosts of the dead

forever staring upon them

while not being truly with them

myself

/

i reach a hand forward to touch you.

but you are forever out of reach.

\\\

_**~syl** _


End file.
